Wednesday, February 20, 2008

By the 10th time I'm drifting away

Today is one of those days where I completely doubt myself.

My chosen career, namely how much it has and will continue to cost me to obtainin that career, is drowning me today, and I can't quite shake the thought that I would be happier playing guitars with Heidi the rest of my life. I don't even know if I actually know how to play the guitar anymore, and that's a weird weird WEIRD phenomenon.

I also can't figure out why it is apparently impossible for me to keep my house clean, regardless of how many resolutions I make. Merely saying "I'm just a messy person" doesn't really work when you're 25 yet I am at a loss with how to actually change my behavoir. I keep telling myself that I can just get a cleaning service when I'm older but that is
a. a cop out and
2. not going to help me today.

I wish I was good enough to play poker professionally. There's something that I love doing. Think how awesome I would look in aviators, scotch on the rocks and pocket aces. Seriously.

I desperately trying to remember what I used to do, what used to make me happy and how to get that back.

I don't know that I've ever felt this restless.


Kate said...

Thanks for the link. You know what I like!

Also, the professional poker image: I see it and Dayyum!

post script: my mom reads my blog. I laughed out loud when the link was naked Lindsay.

Wanda said...

I hope you don't mind, I linked your blog on my page.

It may help if you bought yourself some really cool organizing compartments from Ikea or Storables. I would accompany you if you would like. A little here and a little there. Everything has a place or it gets tossed, thats my motto

Mary said...

ditto on the fundage. My family has me booked sunday morning/afternoon, but I could do evening. thoughts? If not hopefully I will at least be seeing you next weekend for my b-day/leaving extravaganza!

Kate said...

okay, for one, I am drunk off of whisky with my brother in Batavia, IL. We are dressed in the same outfit which entails men's dress pants, white dress shirt, and suspenders. We are discussing going into business together. A-N-D, you are one of my best friends. I will for SURE see you again. I LOVE YOU! You are one of the good ones. Yeah, remember that. I'll babysit your children, I mean, if you decide to have them. You know? yeah. I LOVE YOU. So does Batavia. She is hot as ever.